I am thinking about marriage this cold morning. I've never been married, but I've been blessed by being able to observe more than half a dozen strong, long-lasting marriages -- my four uncles and my grandparents. Today, (February 8th) is my parents' wedding anniversary. They were married for nearly 40 years, until my dad's death in 1996.
My parents' marriage was pretty tumultuous, likely because they were complete opposites in personality and temperament, but Mom knew that laughter was the healing glue that held them together. She talked about it openly.
A few years ago I compiled her blogs into a book called Singing to the Cows, and here is a funny story about marriage:
This, then, is where we talk about laughter. How could one stand to live so closely with other people, without a sense of humor? I mean, let’s just be truthful here. Most naked people are just funny looking! Have a look in the mirror and tell me I’m wrong. I’m dead certain my parents wouldn’t have had such a long marriage nor would Tony and I, if we couldn’t laugh at most anything.
One night around midnight, when my parents were visiting us, we heard a loud crash in the guest bathroom. We jumped out of bed, terrified at what we were going to find. When I threw open the door, my 6ft 4in dad, clad in his red striped pj’s, was climbing out of the bathtub. He said he’d tried to close the door before turning on the light, and when he reached for the light switch with his right hand, his entire body just kept going until he fell into the tub. Even with his arthritis, he was not hurt, and we all returned to bed. Then we heard him and Mother, the rascals. He would retell the story and they would just hoot. I went to sleep that night listening to them giggle, on the other side of the wall.I've never pretended to know anything about marriage. I know my parents laughed often, though. So there's my best advice: find a way to laugh together.
below, Mom and Dad
#bestmarriageadvice, #laughterheals
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